Quotes Page
2004/5’s Fantastic Quotes
"For crying out loud- where are my tablets?"
Kirsty Shearer
"I’m bound to say something stupid by the end of the day!"
Kirsty Shearer
"Oh! I’m sitting on the babies!"
Emma Lambourne
"I need more medication!"
Kirsty Shearer
"I just tried to snog a P4 book…."
Phil Adsley
"Shut up or Cruella will turn you all into fur coats"
Mary Cholerton
"Your boots have a wedgie!"
Lauren Pettit
"The birdie is stuck to the back of the poo!"
Emma Lambourne
"Everything’s going up, except the stuff that’s going down, everything’s going up"
Matthew Andrews
"Emma’s mashing Chinnock!"
Laura Towns
Steven Gering: "I’m going to pelt you with my peppermint!"
Emma Lambourne: [Indignantly] "That’s MY peppermint!"
Steven Geering: "Fine, I’m going to pelt you with Emma’s peppermint!"
"I’ve just got this image now of 101 naked men running around a magazine on the floor"
Emma Lambourne
"4ft insane guys do it for me!"
Kirsty Shearer
"Have you finished f***ing yet?"
Hannah the midget to Amy the f***er!
"My balls keep catching on my jumper"
Hannah
"You can only drag me round by Craig’s drumstick"
Kirsty Shearer
"If I end up with Will Liddle on my head I will not be happy!"
Kirsty Shearer
"That was the first time I’ve ever been a woman"
Kirsty Shearer
"If I end up on Kirsty Shearer’s head, I will not be happy"
Will Liddle
"I’m sitting on Bruce Forsythe"
Emma Lambourne
Kirsty Shearer: "So, does he go normal after this?"
Will Liddle: "He’s talking to a pot"
[About Keats]
"Hey, last night Adam was getting very SQUIDGY with me!"
Lauren Pettit
"Can I have another ball please, Chris?"
Amanda Parsons
"To live is to make mistakes. Therefore, I live a lot!"
Kirsty B
"I couldn’t be bi……I couldn’t (originally ‘can’t’) stand to be rejected by men as well as women!"
(originally ‘can’t’) Steven Geering
"I don’t know if woman find life more difficult, I’ve never been one!"
James Florey
"I have to drink out of something that has been on Phil’s crotch!"
Kirsty Shearer
"Why do my parents never answer their phones? Oh, hello!"
Lauren Pettit
"Oh no, I’m turning into Will!"
Kirsty Shearer
"I like girls, honest I do. I think I like girls! Do I like girls?"
Will Liddle
"Kathryn has just fallen off the wall" Kirsty Shearer.
Kirsty Shearer
"Kirsty’s doing something weird with Chris behind her"
Amanda Parsons
"I think months should be longer, like a month long"
Laura Towns
"Craig is a freak, Craig is a freak! OH! Can I have an ice-cream?"
Will Liddle
"We didn’t have a day last Friday"
Kirsty Shearer
"Argh! I forgot my clothes!"
Emma Lambourne
"I really fancy a hot person right now to hug and keep me warm"
Laura Head
"Does it involve putting lots of things together and doing something with it?"
Laura Head
"I’m still holding out for Barry covered in shells"
Kirsty Shearer
"Hannah, please do not indulge your fantasies here!"
Evil Edge
"I’m stuck on Chipie. Oh! Now I’m stuck on Emma!"
Kirsty Shearer
"I’m bent"
Emma Lambourne
"I must never say anything stupid"
Kathryn Sanders
"I’m bent"
Phil Adsley
"Who the hell hit me with Keats"
Will Liddle. – (Will:) Phil your grammar is atrocious?
"So, I’m grappling with a half-naked man?!?"
Phil Adsley
"Is it alright if I leave my clothes here?"
Kirsty Shearer
"I’ve never tried that on you (Caroline). I’ll try it on you later"
Phil Adsley to Caroline
"The hierarchy of cats is very complex…..oh! New quotes!"
Amanda Parsons
"Don’t kiss my balls; they’ve got glitter on them"
Hannah Pitman
"I’m going to drive Dr. Mundy batty"
Hannah Pitman
"Pot any of the yellows except for the red and the black."
Barry Foster
"Smiling hurts me."
Kirsty Shearer
"Look, I did give you something, I gave you fertility!"
Will Liddl
"Why are you filling me up? I’m woozy enough as it is… Anyone up for cocktails later?"
Emma Lambourne
"Craig’s had too much to drink…he’s being positive!"
Kat Saunders
Laura Towns: "Do you still have your balloon?"
Amanda Parsons: "No, Barry swallowed it."
"Look, I’m a real boy!"
Emma Lambourne
"I’m trying to work out what made me think of yoghurt…Oh, Kirsty’s underneath"
Ned Crowley
"I won’t say anything stupid once I leave sixth form"
Kirsty Shearer
Emma: "It’s Phil’s fault"
Kirsty: "No, it’s Carla’s fault, everything is Carla’s fault. Even Phil is Carla’s fault."
"I can assure you I’m not castrated."
Steven Geering
"I’m not doing it – in any shape or form!"
Evil Edge
"Do you want to give it to him?"
Bungle to Steven regarding Phil
Steven Geering: "She’s pulling my head off!"
Maria: "Which one?"
Steven Geering: "Bungle, stop flashing me!"
Bungle: "Steven says that when I get my little key out"
"No CDs, they glow"
Adam Bishop
"Let’s remove all clothes, they get in the way"
Bungle to Phil
"Mr Black showed us the menstrual cycle"
Bungle
"Let’s get on with conception"
Mr Black
Bungle: "Steven, just give it to him!"
Steven Geering: "I have."
"Underwear is so last year darling!"
Will Liddle
"I want to have you in a biology lesson"
Claire McMinn to Phil
"Phil, just please Emma and do it."
Kirsty Shearer
"I found an egg. Has anyone lost and egg? Matt, is this your egg?"
Tom
"I am almost certain that this is either the right or the wrong way out of the car park."
Emma Lambourne
"I think I might change Keats into a woman tonight."
Emma Lambourne
"I’m getting irate now… what with all this monkey bashing."
Will Liddle
"Come to Britain, land of Bums."
Will Liddle
"I’m sure Emma’ll want to sleep with me"
Laura Head
"You had hypothermia on Friday?’ Abi Pettit to Angela
Abi Pettit to Angela
Emily Cross: "I have an i-pod"
Angela Enevolsden: "You have a nipple?"
"Hey! You’re not Mickey Mouse!"
Adam Bishop to Barry
"Do you have a pawn fetish?"
Michael Atkinson to Phil
"But zoo does have three ‘o’s"
Emma Lambourne
"Taking clothes off with one hand isn’t easy; needs practice."
Steven Geering
"Anyway, when you’ve finished mounting each other…"
Steven Geering to Bungle and Michael
"I’m not stroking you, honestly."
Barry Foster to Michael
"Are we all going to just sit here admiring Maria’s legs?"
Steven Geering
"Make sure you press the right buttons, girl!"
Steven Geering
"Will you stop fiddling with yourself!"
Kirsty Shearer to Will
"Let me just find my balls."
Steven Geering
"I know way too much about girls’ boobs!"
Ned Crowley
"I don’t wear a tutu!"
Will Liddle
"I’m not denying that I have male genitalia,"
Will Liddle
Will Liddle: "Does anyone here do Irish? I need a translation."
Laura Towns: "Why don’t you go find Ms O’Grady?"
Will Liddle: "I don’t want to touch her"
Kirsty Shearer: "The cross-dressing tendencies of sixth form are very high"
Chris Chinnock: "Especially when you put me into the equation"
"I hate men. Let’s become lesbian women."
Phil Adsley to Will Liddle
At this point we stop to mourn the passing of the old quotes page, stolen overnight.
"I’m a one woman girl"
Steven Geering
"I’m gonna sit outside the fridge with something blunt… and sharp"
Emma Lambourne
"Emma’s inviting a load of parrots round her house"
Kirsty Shearer
"Its like we had a load of rooms with doors which you can, like, walk through…"
Emma Lambourne
Maria B: "Phil, you’re like a teddy bear, but weird"
Steven Geering: "I’ve hugged him and he ain’t no teddy bear"
"Phil, if you weren’t wearing any trousers you’d have really sexy legs"
Michael Atkinson
"It’s fun to mess with Will"
Barry Foster
"Did you go to University, Miss?"
Tom Stevens to Mrs Lyons
"I pulled it out of my arse-crack"
Hannah Pitmann regarding music essays
"Do you want to put your mouth underneath my lap"
Michael Atkinson
Adam Bishop: "Chippie is at SBS now…?"
Chris Chinnock: "No, he’s just behind you!"
"I’ve got a fairly sizeable wedge myself"
Adam Bishop
"He’s holding out for bed-time"
Laura Towns on Adam Bishop
"What is it about you lot and Mary’s Body Parts?"
Laura Towns
"I want my hand back please"
Mary Cholerton
"I was asleep in the middle of a deep sleep"
Laura Towns
"I had to go pee before I could fit into these trousers"
Tom Stevens
"And I’ve been here since this morning"
Amanda (in the morning)
"Sam, lets pick one each and caress them"
Steven Geering on Maria B
"Bish does not belong to Adam Jackson"
Emma Lambourne
Steven Geering: "I’m like one use only"
Hannah Pitmann: "Like a condom"
Steven: "Yeah, I’m just one big condom"
"I am in desperate need of some help"
Mrs Keogh
"Hello…argh fuck it’s a text!"
Alex BJ
"There are two certainties in life. One is taxies… - taxies??"
Emma Lambourne
"That bird is flying sideways"
Tom Stevens
"Do you have protection?"
Adam Bishop to Mary Cholerton
Phil Adsley: "that’s indecent assault"
Emma Lambourne: "Well, I looked up this website…"
Amanda Parsons: "I can’t spell"
Laura Towns: "S-P-E-L"
Amanda: "L"
"I’m Julia the whore"
Kirsty Shearer
"I have a similar image of something very similar"
Will Liddle
"I think The Cardinal would be called Borachio"
Kirsty Shearer, in a dreamy voice
"I can’t talk and think at the same time"
Emma Lambourne
"We had to go to a church and have water thrown over us"
Kirsty B
"It would be quite useful if you had a walking toilet"
Laura Towns
"That looks sooo weird!"
Ned looks at himself in the mirror
"I have no objection to paying people for their services"
Kirsty Shearer
"Trust me, my brother’s feet smell nothing like as good as yours"
Kirsty Shearer to Amanda Parsons
"We need to get you a drink"
Emma Lambourne to Amanda Parsons
"Was I a carrot or was I something else?"
Kirsty Shearer
Kirsty S: "Maths teachers all look like witches in my head"
…
Amanda Parsons (on Mr Logan): "I can’t imagine him in a robe"
Kirsty: "First imagine him in a dressing gown, then transform it into a robe"
Amanda: ~why a dressing gown… surely a coat is closer~
Kirsty: "I can’t imagine him in a coat"
Amanda: "But you can in a dressing gown?"
…
Amanda: "Well, you could interpret that as Kirsty can only imagine people in her dressing gown"
Kirsty: "But that can still be interpreted as I can only imagine people wearing my dressing gown!"
"Ok people…I need you to say stupid stuff to make me look less stupid"
Kirsty Shearer
"I’d had a lot of wine. Well, one glass"
Emma Lambourne
Amanda and Kirsty together: "When blenders go bad"
Amanda: "It’s like the day of the triffids, only with kitchen appliances"
"Lets go look at Tom’s parts!"
Matthew Andrews
"He came and then he went and then he came again… oh no that sounds bad!"
Lauren Pettit
"What’s tomorrow?"
Emma Lambourne
"My arse isn’t detachable…kneecaps"
Steven Geering
"I don’t hate gays… I love them!"
James Florey and Barry Foster
"My hair gets kinky during the night"
Laura Head
"Yes… I want you on the couch"
Christine Lonsdale to Michael Atkinson
"I use men all the time"
Laura Head
"The T-Shirts are to be printed: ‘I danced with Chinnock 2005‘"
Tom Stevens
"you could’ve seen it all last night ;-)"
Tom Stevens to Adam Bishop via MSN Messenger
"I love people despite their religion"
Laura Head, following a debate on the subject of Baptists and Anglicans:
"I can air fiddle lower down, too"
" Adam Jackson
"I have been ordered to slap you hard"
" Chris Chinnock to Steven Geering
Chris Chinnock: "We don’t really dance, we just sway and then mosh"
Kirsty Shearer: "Maybe we Smosh"
"I failed in doing an eggplant and succeeded in doing a moose!"
???
"I got three ‘5’s in a roll"
Christine Lonsdale
"Lay it like a chicken"
Christine Lonsdale
"Happiness comes with the runs"
Emma Lambourne
"James…Come!"
Christine Lonsdale
"What’s the point in life if it’s not sex?"
Emma Lambourne
Caroline Whitehead: "How else would you like to be Barried?"
Emma Lambourne: "Well… I personally prefer to be "Barried" on my side"
"I prefer my men to be a little longer than 2 inches"
Emma Lambourne
"Can I have a go in your hole?"
Adam Bishop to Matt Andrews
"It’s fun to mess with Will"
Barry Foster
Christine Lonsdale: "I spy with my little eye something beginning with ‘S’"
Adam Bishop: "Sircle!"
"My mother was an iron golem!"
Steven Geering
"No body is pouring double cream on to them selves!"
Kirsty S
"Who would want to breed a hippopotamus and a toad?"
Hannah Pittmann
"That’s not fair, Phil gets all the fun!"
Emma Lambourne
Amanda: "Phwoar, look at that brick."
Laura T: "No, that one’s much more attractive."
Kirsty: "Sexy bricks!"
"Tom and Craig are couples"
Madeleine Pepper
"Why is everything I touch about sex?"
Will Liddle
"I think the servers in my brain were connected"
Emma Lambourne
"Can anyone stick his bucket in a head of chip fat"
Emma Lambourne
Tom Stevens: "You want a Urinal?"
Kirsty Shearer: "Yes"
"I find it amazing how these things have a life of their own"
Emma about a cat
"If I was a girl…"
Laura Head
on October 28th, 2005 at 9:59 am
Can I just say me surname is PETTIT
on October 28th, 2005 at 4:51 pm
My bad.
Still, 2 bad spellings out out of ~200 isn’t bad. And I did spell it right 6 other times on this page.
on November 23rd, 2006 at 1:35 am
Umm… I’ve just looked back on this and sometimes you’ve spelt my surname wrong - it’s PITMAN. Never mind though - brought back some great memories…
on November 23rd, 2006 at 1:40 am
Was not I, I just copied and pasted
I’ll fix it, just as soon as it’s not 2 in the morning any more.
And what are you doing on the internets this late anyway, you finally got internets at home?
on November 23rd, 2006 at 1:44 am
Hehe, my powers of stalking lead me to believe you do indeed have home internets, and they are belong to Tiscali.
Am I right?:)